A Reality Check

It's one thing to know that you have a senior in high school, but it's a completely different thing to "suddenly" realize that she will be temporarily leaving in a few short months...Often referred to by some as the "Ice Queen" (Angelo..cough..cough), I never dreamt that this would bring me down. I thought that it would simply be a day of celebration, another milestone met--much like potty training and learning to ride a bike. Oddly, however, there have been a few red flags thrown in my path lately that should have been indicators that this wasn't going to be such an easy process after all:

1. While browsing Hobby Lobby one day in February, I came across the first piece of Class of 2011 paraphernalia--it was a simply picture frame with happy, smiling graduates. Out of nowhere, I felt my throat tighten and tears well-up behind my eyes. "Odd," I thought. "Where in the world did that come from?"

2. As my high school's lead senior advisor, graduation and all of its many splendors are second nature to me. I've organized countless senior games, breakfasts, photos, trips, and practices. They are normally events to be simply marked off a list until the BIG DAY (which by the way is always a great day because it kicks off summer break! Yippee!)...I made it through the majority of the events this year without a hitch...that is until this year's group photo. All of a sudden Stephanie walked out in her cap and gown and ...gulp...those crazy crocodile tears again.

3. Steph asked me to sit down with her last weekend and address her graduation invitations. I never for one minute thought that this was anything other than her way of getting me to do the dirty work for her (she is still a teenager with a HUGE lazy streak after all!), but as I was stuffing envelopes, the thought crossed my mind that the next time we would probably do something like this together would be at her wedding (many, many years down the road!)...sob....

4. and, the biggest wake-up call to date happened on Friday. On the same day I got two emails from NCSU...one telling her about her roommate and their rooming assignment and the other giving her instructions for enrolling in classes for the fall!! Yikes!

How much am I expected to handle?  My first one is leaving (albeit she'll only be 45 minutes down the road), and I realize that life as I have known it for the past 17 years will never be the same...I am proud of her and have total confidence that she will handle it well...the person I'm now worried about is me....